3.2 | Upleveling Your Brand From the Inside with Maximillian Webster
Unknown Speaker 0:00
Welcome to Devotional Anarchy, a podcast about intimate embodied leadership that is radically human, honest AF and thereby inherently disruptive to systems of disempowerment and disconnection. I am Isha Vela, trauma psychologist, certified somatic intimacy Alchemist, wealth wizard, shadow doula, love anarchist, intuitive channel, and sovereign business coach. You’re here because you know intimate self connection is the source of everything you want to create in life. And that building safety and trust in your own body is what allows you to fully own and steward your energy and your relationships. Get ready to explore attachments, sexuality, spirituality, self expression and sovereignty and other relational themes from a trauma responsive somatic energetic lens. The conversations and tools shared in this podcast are designed to offer permission to create the abundant life, love and business that lights your soul on fire.
Unknown Speaker 1:06
It’s the first time a man has come on to the devotional anarchy podcast, and I’m so glad Max got the honor of being my first. Maximilian Webster aka diva DOM daddy is a rebellious visionary and mystical branding wizard who specializes in mentoring women, through overcoming their inner self imposed limitations, and breaking through societal pressures to conform helping them bring out the radical, unapologetic and unfuck winnable Rockstar that’s been hiding within. I invited Max the podcast because we have a lot of overlap in our work, especially as it relates to identity shifts, shadow work and personal branding and leadership. In this conversation, he shares his experiences and practices working with his own identity transformation. And he also shares his framework for working with the inner critic, the saboteur and the perpetrator, you’re gonna come away from this conversation with some really amazing tools to uplevel your personal brand in your mission led work. But before we dive into the alchemy, I’m so excited to announce that my new signature program the Sovereign Business Accelerator, is open for enrollment. This is a six month program for revolutionary coaches and disruptive solopreneurs. Wanting to build and scale a social impact business while prioritizing energy management, inner alchemy and being your real self on the internet. And to give you a taste of what’s inside, I’m hosting a five day open house where you’re going to get four days of no BS, practical nuggets, you’re going to be able to implement immediately in your business with a q&a On the fifth day to answer all of your questions about whether the sovereign business accelerator is the right fit for you. It’s all going down February 13, through 17th, at 2pm PST each day, and you’re going to learn what it means to run sovereign business, what specific areas to focus on to increase sales, you’re gonna learn about building social impact models into your business, and some simple business structures that build safety in your nervous system. The link to register is in the show notes. I’m so excited about it. Okay, let’s go deep with Max.
Unknown Speaker 3:23
Hi, Max, I’m so excited to have you on the podcast. And to get into this. What is to be a very deep and thrilling conversation. I’m so excited. Thank you for having me. Yeah. So, you know, you and I have, you know, we’ve talked a bit in preparation for this interview or for this chat. We’ve, you know, met a couple times. And we’ve talked about like the importance of identity
Unknown Speaker 3:52
as an entrepreneur, like, I’d love to hear what your take is on it. Like how do you how do you see that process? unfolding?
Unknown Speaker 4:04
Yeah, I love that. Well, just for a little backstory.
Unknown Speaker 4:08
I’ve been doing a lot of parts work, identity work, I just had the realization that I was like an identity coach to be two weeks ago. But it’s one of those things. It’s in your toolbox and you’re so close to it, you realize until you go to explain it to someone.
Unknown Speaker 4:25
So it’s really funny. I feel like I’m in this really like It’s like this new beginning energy when it comes to like human explaining it. I have talked a lot of my clients. I’ve been a coach since 2015. And so I am really familiar with like shamanic journeying, inner child work, and archetypal play, if you will,
Unknown Speaker 4:48
as an expression of your consciousness, and so I get really excited about the inner workings of
Unknown Speaker 4:56
why we do what we do, basically. Yeah.
Unknown Speaker 5:00
And so I’ve noticed a lot of themes and I’ve come to a place where now I have kind of a rough framework that I’ve been working with called Healthy, masculine energy.
Unknown Speaker 5:12
It’s a little
Unknown Speaker 5:14
what’s the word I want to say controversial, but I, I purposefully named it healthy, masculine energy, just because I want it to be a conversation starter. I think that these archetypes are present in both, or any range of expression. You know, I mean, when it comes to the archetypes, what I played with is the inner critic, the inner saboteur, the inner perpetrator. And then on the opposite side of that the inner, the inner critics opposite is the inner lover. Inner saboteur is the inner provider, and the inner perpetrator, I kind of oscillate between your inner warrior integrated protector. And it’s really cool that these specific archetypes have dropped in for me recently, over the past year, like spirit has been guiding me to like my work, you know. And so when these came into form, I started playing with them. And I noticed how, you know, you hear something like your inner saboteur, we’re all familiar with self sabotage, right? I noticed how something like that, you know, just to kind of paint a picture, I was doing a session with a client, and he wanted to work with whatever archetypal, you know, archetype came up, and it was his inner saboteur, he was noticing how he was, you know, wanting to move forward in his business, he was wanting to make these changes, but in the morning, he’d wake up and like immediately just start scrolling his phone. So very lazy, apathetic. So the inner saboteur presented it. So yeah, it was so magical to realize that the inner saboteur in that place was acting on this really beautiful, innate wisdom, keeping him safe from burning out again. Yeah, so it’s really cool, you know, to see the different archetypes come out to play, you think Oh, inner saboteur must be like the shadow, this dark side is terrible. Yeah. And really, I think what I love about these archetypes is it’s it’s a place for integration. You know, we are holistic beings. And so I kind of coined this while I was in the shower earlier today, but it’s like integration ceremonies is what I got people through using archetypes. So that’s just an introduction of where I’m at. And a little nervous system. I haven’t really talked about this, not on my writing or in workshops. So yeah,
Unknown Speaker 7:36
we’ll see what comes up. This is beautiful. No, I love I love your particular take on right. We often people get frustrated when they feel a sense, then when they have an awareness that they are getting in their own way, and they get really angry. And I love that you named the wisdom of that part. Right? Because like, all of these parts are here for like, they’re obviously here for a good reason. We didn’t just come up with this shit, because we want to punish ourselves. But there’s, yeah, there’s a very good reason that they’re protective here. And so we want to get curious about like, what are how are they serving us, for sure. And in my experience, it really all comes down to safety and security. You know, we as humans, we seek safety, we seek security and we have all these ways that in our mind, body spirit come together to keep us safe. And you know, that can present itself as a challenge. When you are an ever evolving individual. When you’re a leader when you’re you know trying to make an impact in the world you want to kind of continue moving forward and so like you said, we kind of pathologized I think that’s the right word. Like the process of like being a self sabotaging, we get angry, we get resentful. And so this is this conversation. This practice is a limitation to compassion to configurations realizing that all these parts are there are reasons they wouldn’t be there if you didn’t. Yes, exactly. And people think that if you love on them, yeah, that it’ll make them bigger. It’ll it’ll like accentuate them but it actually has the opposite effect. It actually like lets those parts kind of relax and they feel seen they feel heard they feel they hit their felt. And then they can like kind of like oh, okay, I’m you see that I’m here. You know that I’m here. I can can rest now. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah, I was just curious about your journey into not discovering but like, like, how you came up on these archetypes like your own process of recognizing like, within yourself? Yeah. Yeah.
Unknown Speaker 9:42
It’s cool. I don’t really know where to start with this one. I, I feel like it was almost like a
Unknown Speaker 9:49
back of the mind configuration as I started working with more clients, you know, I very much intuitively can feel in my body because I
Unknown Speaker 10:00
intuitive and highly sensitive. When people have blocks in certain areas, I can like feel it in my body. And they typically come with beliefs and stories. And so I just started putting names to these very common ones, I think, just in the back of my head. And then I started practicing with myself and like realizing, where are these archetypes present? How are they showing up? And a lot of this started to form maybe last summer. And so it was just really fun. At the same time, I was playing with some really playful like archetypes or something different. It was like roleplay. Basically, I was working with my inner teenager, my inner Gremlin, you know, I’m sure if you all have been on Facebook and Instagram recently, you know, you’ve heard of the villain era. And so
Unknown Speaker 10:47
yeah, it was really interesting to start to do that work on myself as well, because I also noticed an underlying theme with these archetypes. Alright, so we’re gonna break them down real quick, still kind of figuring it out. So give me by which of these a little bit, but so the inner critic speaks and lives, your inner lovers speaks in truth, right? And so you think about, you know, the stories of beliefs, the places where we try to limit ourselves, our inner critic, you know, generally comes up, and it’s like, you know, you’re not good enough, you know, who are you to be doing this thing.
Unknown Speaker 11:23
You know, especially in identity transition, such as something I’m going through, actually, right now.
Unknown Speaker 11:30
The inner lover comes in, that’s like your best friend. That’s like your show lover. That’s like a parental figure, God, whatever you want to call it, seeing yourself the way that they see you. They see your truth they see all of you, they don’t just see your flaws are not picking you apart. They’re actually doing the exact opposite, right? It’s unconditional. That’s kind of like, you’re just you’re awesome, just as you are.
Unknown Speaker 11:53
Yes. You know, I had a really hard time tapping into that part of myself, I have a history of self abandonment of shame. And I actually, as I’m peeling back more of these layers, within my own practice, I’m realizing that that’s actually been a baseline for my life really operating in my inner critic, and that’s kind of a part of me that was causing me to show up in the world is like, doing too much.
Unknown Speaker 12:15
Never really giving myself the credit, like, hey, like you’re killing it, maybe like, look how much you’ve done it, you know, you have the rest of your life ahead of you. That’s, that’s all new to me. Now, you know, I think we both talked about marrying ourselves. Yes. Yes. Actually, to answer your question and go back. I think that was a first experience, you know, getting a ring for myself. Committing to myself, my inner lover. Yeah, there it is. There that is hot. Yes. Oh, that’s so good. And what is, um, you don’t have to answer this question. But I’m curious as to what identity transformation Do you experience yourself in right now? Sometimes, it feels like it’s too edgy to talk about, because you’re right in it. But yeah, if you’re willing to know I think thank you so much for the opportunity, because that’s definitely my shot, practicing being seen more.
Unknown Speaker 13:06
And so to peel back the curtains or pull back the curtain so what what’s going on right now? Um, I feel like I have been playing with new identities. For me specifically artists has been really active.
Unknown Speaker 13:21
So coming since May, since
Unknown Speaker 13:25
maybe 2013 2014, I picked up the coach identity
Unknown Speaker 13:32
picked up the teacher identity, you know, working with kids live school, yes. Picked up the healer role when I started getting into healing arts. And so there’s, there’s those identities, there’s a way that people perceive us, we kind of get comfortable in those. And so, last year, around summertime, I was noticing that something deep within me was like there’s something out of alignment, defiance done pouring in. Anytime that happens. It’s like alright, let’s let’s do some self reflection. Let’s see what’s going on. I realized that I was limiting myself by only operating as a coach, a healer, a teacher, you know what I mean? Those identities? Yes. So I’ve been playing with what does an artist feel like? What does an investor feel like? What does a CEO pay like? And most recently, I had the biggest realization, I was like, Wait a second. I don’t even want to be a fucking CEO. I’m a creative director, like I’m a strategist, I’m a marketer. So all those new identities artists or investor there’s been a lot of opportunity for shadow works to come up with play because I noticed specifically how I thought I was out of integrity with those parts of myself that wanted a place to live. Meaning I was I’m feeling like I’m an investor now. You know, why am I not doing as much as I can be doing and the money front, you know, your long term?
Unknown Speaker 14:53
Goal situation? Yeah, so it’s like coming back and like, feeling that shame feeling that guilt but also having a
Unknown Speaker 15:00
Plan, you know, moving forward in that area. And that’s what I really love about this healthy masculine energy framework. It’s not to be more masculine, it’s to have that drive determination and focus to move forward with integrity, and in alignment, you know, so really what I always strive for in my own practice and with clients is harmony and coherence. So what I really love about these archetypes is they really help you to identify where you’re out of integrity out of alignment with yourself whether you’re on the side of the spectrum identifying with inner critic or the other side, where you’re identifying as a lover, you know, maybe your lovers coming in, and you know,
Unknown Speaker 15:38
oh, you’re doing so great. You know, don’t worry about fuck your goals slow on the beat. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, and we got to pay well, I’ll say right, it’s kind of like the exonerate or like, yeah, no, wrong baby.
Unknown Speaker 15:58
Exactly, there is that balance, right? Like we call it like masculine and feminine, right? There is there is that balance between struggling the structure holding the flow, right, creative energy, sexual energy, spiritual energy, even intuition, right. But we do need that structure even. Even just the frameworks of having you know, these archetypes is really really helpful for understanding ourselves and being being able to hold ourselves accountable.
Unknown Speaker 16:29
Right to like to showing up in our leadership in ways that are right that are coherent.
Unknown Speaker 16:36
Yeah. And I’m curious Max, what does your what is Shadow Work look like for you when you’re when you’re deep in the shit like, looking at me like
Unknown Speaker 16:47
okay, oh, I’m just gonna break down my sun moon rising real quick for you all because I’m a Leo rising SAP sun, Capricorn.
Unknown Speaker 16:56
Holy shit. A lot of play. A lot of blondes like in your face, like, truth is my North Star. So yeah, I have a lot of fun with it. As you know, you know, ever evolving individual stuff is gonna come up all the time every day. So you kind of have to have a sense of like art and is really easy to slip into that shame and guilt. Like how am I kind of terrible, but it’s like
Unknown Speaker 17:21
yeah, so that’s for me Shadow Work has a lot of lightheartedness, a lot of reverence to though, I feel on a grander scale. So my inner musings, my philosophy has been evolving as well. And I really feel like we’re on this planet to feel everything, you know. And so, I, as a back having a background in like delusional optimism. I’m a visionary and idealist. Like I’m really good at playing in the energy of like, expansion and innovation vision, and you know, what could be
Unknown Speaker 17:57
and so forth like this? I guess to bring it home to landing the plane. Ah, I
Unknown Speaker 18:06
Unknown Speaker 18:08
lost my train of thought. That’s okay. Yeah, it was about like, Shadow Work. Like when you’re deep in the shadow work? What is it looking like for you? Yeah, so play truth. And, yeah, so I think rather, what I was trying to answer is why shadow work is so important to me, I think that
Unknown Speaker 18:26
this is such an essential practice. For everybody at the collective, I think we’re all tapping into the same themes and archetypes and lessons. And that’s kind of how I, I like to look at shadow work as my contribution to the collective
Unknown Speaker 18:47
and so it’s, it’s really interesting too, because when you start playing with different parts of your conscious, notice different parts of like, the collective archetypes
Unknown Speaker 18:58
you become a channel for you know, God life it is to express itself through you, right. And so what can happen is when we are experiencing a lot of chaos and turbulence, like things that are not good in our reality are things that we are not in super good aligned with our mission with our purpose. We’re resisting that flow of energy where is resisting life? Or resisting the natural flow of growth and evolution? Right. So that’s kind of my philosophy behind why shadow workers? Yeah, no, and I love that you’re you you have used the phrase like blocking your blessings, right? Because it’s like, I feel it like the flow of a river like our natural state is like the flow of a river. And our shadow is like some of the rocks in the river that are damming up the process a little bit. Yeah. And it’s like, we can just you know, remove the rocks or roll them off to the side and then like, yeah, and then it’s going right then you’re, then you’re a full Fucking yes to the things that you really want and you’re allowing them to come to you, for sure.
Unknown Speaker 20:00
It really is an energetic thing sometimes. And obviously, right like life has its own little way of, you know, it’s planned out in its own way. And we can co create with it. Yes, that’s like a perfect segue into the inner provider and the inner
Unknown Speaker 20:17
saboteur, okay? So the inner provider creates order, and the inner saboteur creates chaos, right. So they’re both creational energy very much in alignment with what we’re talking about. When we tap into our inner provider, we are tapping into our inherent deservingness, we’re tapping into the flow of life, like we came here to birth to create, right, so that’s going to happen, it needs to happen.
Unknown Speaker 20:45
Unknown Speaker 20:46
when we tap into our inner provider, what I really like to give this as a visual is like, it’s intuitive, knowing its body based knowing it set, you know, the idea for that course that you you know, want to launch randomly that drops in like right before bed. It’s, it’s, it’s, it wants to create order in your life, it wants to create, you know, rotation and to build upon that, you know, at least half of I think the inner saboteur kind of comes in and creates with chaos and kind of those things apart, because it’s trying to get your attention as well. You know, he talks about those rocks forever, your, your inner saboteur is going to perpetuate these patterns in your life for you to eventually come and pick up those rocks and like, alright, what is the lesson between the highness? Where am I out of alignment? Where am I having integrity, right?
Unknown Speaker 21:38
Like we said before, it’s it’s such an, it’s a wisdom within itself, right. And so, when it comes to integrating these two, I think it’s really just important to be mindful of
Unknown Speaker 21:51
just like your inner practice on a more consistent basis. I think that that’s really where you can start playing with these archetypes more, on a deeper level, it’s just coming back to home come back to center seeing which one is alive.
Unknown Speaker 22:04
And not kind of noticing your own cycles as well. What is the practice look like for you?
Unknown Speaker 22:10
Like for example with with the saboteur have how have you suffered the subaltern provider? How have those shown up for you, in your relationships? Or in your business? And how have you worked with them? Great question. I remember specifically a time where I actually brought this practice to my last launch. And I was noticing that I had, you know, the vision is to create this program and launch it, sell it get people get butts in seats.
Unknown Speaker 22:40
So my inner saboteur was coming up, like perpetuating all the patterns of like burnout, and like over exerting myself operating from the fact that I’m not doing enough energy, right. So I was going to go live four to six times this week, I need to, you know, do XYZ, all the things that I think I need to do to get these buttons, right, yeah, so my inner provider comes in as like, Hey, Max, you are actually different, like, a different point in your life, you built your brand. Now your message, you don’t need to work as hard, you actually need to work smarter, you know what I mean? And so I realized that like, okay, rather than taking that crucial energy at creating chaos and creating, you know, on sturdy a fucking foundation, I go in and come up with a plan that feels good, where I can resource my own
Unknown Speaker 23:28
capacity I can, I can really be honest about you know, where I am and my desire to create maybe I don’t want to be live a bunch of time this week. So I’m going to maybe do one live but I want to have more focused on speaking directly to my customers probably gonna have more structured strategy behind it, because that supports my future that supports my flow that supports my foundation. Moving forward. Does that make sense? Yeah, no, I’m just I’m hearing you talk and even the the tone in your voice changed. It just felt so gentle and so kind right? It just felt so loving like hey, you don’t need to do all this. Like you can just make it really simple and right like to trust to come back to trust it’s gonna be okay.
Unknown Speaker 24:15
Yeah, I love that you brought that up because it is a felt experience. Like I said before going back to home I think the biggest thing that I’ve taken from this exercise it’s when I when I approach sales and marketing from a place of I’m already taken care of I don’t need to make a sale I’m providing for other people to my gift, my God given gift that I can’t run out of it’s gonna keep coming or not, you know what I mean that energy, life does become more you feel safe, you feel relaxed, you feel at ease, and that’s what people are attracted to maybe
Unknown Speaker 24:46
say no on marketing.
Unknown Speaker 24:50
By the way, just singing
Unknown Speaker 24:56
I love that. I love that. Yeah, that that trust
Unknown Speaker 25:00
Yeah, I talk about safety and trust, a whole shitload. And it’s really true. It’s like that that relationship, it really is a spiritual relationship to source right and tapping into creative source creative energy and source within yourself, right? Like trusting that it’ll, it’ll drop in what it needs to drop in. Right? There is an unending flow as long as you’re open and listening to it. And sometimes it’s slower. Right, and you get the droplets instead of like a fire hose. But it’s it’s there. Yeah. Yeah, that’s really powerful. Mm hmm. Thank you. Yeah. And I got, is there anything else that you want to that feels really like you want to? Yeah, I want to share the last two archetypes as well. Yeah. Because I feel like
Unknown Speaker 25:50
the inner protector, the inner warrior, that’s one I work with the most often right now, and definitely in my, my own initiation with my warrior energy.
Unknown Speaker 26:01
And then on the other side of that is the inner perpetrator. And I do want to just bring up that, as you play with these different archetypes. Give me one second, my laptop needs to be plugged in. Okay. As you play with this inner archetypes, going back to that felt sense, right? We were talking about earlier, you really want to be super gentle with yourself as you are going.
Unknown Speaker 26:26
Doing these best practices.
Unknown Speaker 26:28
I love being seen and witnessed in this with other people.
Unknown Speaker 26:35
That’s where a lot of our wounds come from, because I can work with relational wounding, you know.
Unknown Speaker 26:41
And at the same time, as you’re practicing these embodying these archetypes, you’re going to notice that sometimes you’re going to have a visceral response to it. For me, my inner perpetrator, there’s a lot of shame, there’s a lot of guilt around the way that I’ve got my own life, you know, what I mean? How I make things harder than they need to be. And so
Unknown Speaker 27:04
Unknown Speaker 27:07
what is the, I can’t remember the two phrases that I did with the inner perpetrator and the inner warrior at this moment. But when it comes down to is, this is a part of you that actually goes and takes the action and fulfills the divine assignment, like we were talking about earlier that like that plan that tuition is that masculine, quote, unquote, forest that actually goes out there and moves the energy do or yeah, that do are exactly, exactly. And so
Unknown Speaker 27:41
I feel like I switch subjects really quickly there. My apologies.
Unknown Speaker 27:45
Yeah, giving yourself compassion for it’s going to be a whirlwind and you know, things can come up. And
Unknown Speaker 27:52
that’s kind of how the inner perpetrator and the inner warrior show up. It’s like, when you’re actually a party that actually goes out and does it right. The inner perpetrator would have showed up in that scenario earlier before, if I was if I would have went forward and did the lives anyway and ignored my intuition. Right. It’s almost like it can be a little bit of an attacking energy. Yes. Right. Like, it’s almost like a don’t maybe, like a little bit self harm me. Yeah. Yeah. It’s it’s definitely, you know, for me, it shows up as self abandonment, it shows up for shows up as, you know, not doing the things that I know that I need to do to bring more harmony and coherence in my life. But you know, sometimes, like I said, before, we have stuff that we are working through that hasn’t quite been healed, that will perpetuate your inner perpetrator. Yeah, yeah. And how do you? You know, when working with clients, what have you been? What have you noticed in yourself? Like, how does this show up? In our marketing? How does it show up specifically in our business, or in our leadership that you feel like, is really important for people to know? Like, sometimes it’s really good to have examples? Yeah, so people can feel like, oh, yeah, that’s me, or for sure. The first one that pops up because we can go into all this, but the first one that comes up is money. And I think a perfect example is under charging or taking on clients. Just because you need the money, right? Yes, yes. We all know how that perpetuates fucking chaos in our life.
Unknown Speaker 29:32
We’ll be going live with a client that says Vampires Sucks all your energy, you don’t want to work with them. But you could have avoided that by selling them the coaching you know, and maybe not selling them but package and so they can show in in that way. I feel like that’s money slash business.
Unknown Speaker 29:51
I think when it comes down to your inner protector and your inner,
Unknown Speaker 29:58
your inner protector and your inner warrior
Unknown Speaker 30:00
are what really works for me and my clients is this ceremony that I do with them. And I have them visualize like their sacred mission, their sacred purpose. And it’s this eternal flame that you have to like walk down
Unknown Speaker 30:14
the sacred passageway, and then you call forth your inner protect your your inner warrior, and it’s our Do you that’s like, nothing is getting past this line, you know? I mean, yeah. So in the money or in the business circumstance, it’s like that underlying client comes to the gate, and they’re protected in a way is like,
Unknown Speaker 30:37
this is my price is blank. Yeah, man. And that’s a party that allows you to stand firm in that energy and your standards and your boundaries. So yeah, that’s, that’s a really fun one to work with.
Unknown Speaker 30:52
That is really good. Yeah. And I mean, this all of these pieces, I’ve noticed for myself, my, my, my biggest struggle has been in my writing, and in really communicating value, or especially like about myself, like, really, because that, you know, I’m very, I’m very good at claiming, like, Yeah, I’m a flawed human, and I have all of these parts, right, I can talk easily about that. But what’s more challenging for me is to really step into like, I am fucking awesome at what I do. Right? That’s, that’s harder for me to step in. I think it’s hard for a lot of people because we feel we grow up experiencing shame around our higher selves, right? Like, we don’t get to really shine, right? And so
Unknown Speaker 31:42
I feel like that that work has been sort of very, very big for me over the last, I would say, a year and a half of communicating. And that because it does feel myself like pulling back, right in that moment, where it’s like, okay, this is the moment in this post where you like, come in big, and say the fucking thing. And then I’m just like, yeah, no, it’s okay. I mean, they know already. Sure, for sure, that can come up in very subtle ways, like, in, in, in sales, writing or in, like, how you market yourself, like all of those pieces, it’s, and people don’t often notice the subtleties of it, for sure. Yeah, I just want to highlight some of that I’m seeing, you’re noticing these different moments that these parts of you are showing up. And I think that that’s so important, because at the end of the day, you want to have a working relationship with these parts. Yeah, you they are things are embodying through you, right? So you get to kind of pick and choose. So
Unknown Speaker 32:47
no, as easy. That sounds kind of the hardest part, right? Yeah. But I guess what I’m trying to say here is, when you develop a relationship with these parts, yourself, you start to notice when they want to come play, and you guys start doing different exercises, you know, access, accessing that space between when you’re about to make a decision. And you know, when you’re noticing the charge or whatever, that’s bringing up this opportunity for self exploration, taking a pause and being like, Okay, I’m noticing that my inner perpetrator wants to come up. What really works with myself and with clients like giving that part of you a character, giving it a name, giving it enough?
Unknown Speaker 33:28
Giving it features? Yeah, there’s sometimes another way that I can answer your question about how I work with these parents. I would literally imagine them walking down the street. Like, this is me. I am that I am but that there’s also different parts of me that are on this journey with me. Yes, check in with them. You know, how are you walking? You know, how are they expressing? You know, why, what? Why is my inner child freaking getting upset right now after that encounter that has happened once? You know what I mean? Yeah.
Unknown Speaker 33:59
Yeah, yeah. I often have people, like actually embody them and express them like to have them exaggerate like I could, you know, for example, or I would ask you, for example, to like, take on the role of this saboteur, and to speak from the saboteur. And like when people start to really like move the energy and they start to recognize like, oh, there’s so much fucking pleasure here, or, yeah, this part is really trying to protect me like, Yeah, and so then then that changes the relationship. It’s like, yeah, you’re not my fucking enemy. You’re like, you’re trying to be good to me. You’re kind of doing it in a fucked up way. But here you are. And I see you I get you. Right. And then that that changes the relationship. Yeah, I think that that that’s where parts work is so brilliant about changing the relationship as long as we have an antagonistic relationship with these parts. It just kind of keeps them right where keeps them stuck. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I love that so much, I think Oh,
Unknown Speaker 35:00
I’m kind of going back to the experience that I’m going through right now, in my shift and identity. What I love about it is I’m learning to slow down learning to get more compassionate with myself. I’m noticing, like how I actually want to show the world, how I actually, you know, the truest version of me how that bridge wants to show up, and maybe how I’ve been acting outside of that, how that’s been serving me. But giving that more compassionate giving presents give you more grace, and just approaching it with that, play. That light hearted approach, having fun with it, we’re all here are actors on a stage? You know, it gets to be fun. Yeah, sometimes. Yeah. And you said something earlier that I want to come back to you said something about the the play piece about having these different parts, like having a different relationship to these parts. And then playing with them, maybe, and I talk about this a lot, like having them be part of your business, like giving them assignments. Like I have a very old, bitchy, Cranky lady that writes a lot of my posts, you know, she’s like, she’s like, fucking shit or get off the pot already. You know, that’s, that’s, I have a lot of that. And it’s kind of an aggressive part. But you know, what I said, you know, write, write some stuff. And there you get to be expressed, right? Or I have this very flirtatious part, right. And that gets to be like, Oh, I get to photograph myself and do selfies and do this or that, you know, that also gets to come out and play. So yeah. How do you how do you play with those parts? Yeah. There’s, I can’t even think about specific example. It’s like such such a baseline for me. It is it is your normal, right? Yeah. Yeah. That’s why I like you. That’s why like, I noticed you right away. I’m just like, Yeah, this, this guy gets it. Pretty cute. Thank you.
Unknown Speaker 36:56
It’s really fun to teach this and to play with it with with clients, just because it’s one of those things that can provide such rapid shifts in your reality. And, you know, as much as I have a disdain for the McDonaldization of like, personal development at the same time, there are things that work really quickly, and can make a massive impact in your relationship with yourself. Oh, it’s just consistency. Yeah, yeah. consistency with the inner work. You’re saying? Yeah, yes. Yeah.
Unknown Speaker 37:28
Yeah. And I mean, how do you feel like, do you feel like you are the kind of person who’s, who’s sort of like, naturally aware and sort of checking in with yourself? How is that process for you? Yeah, yeah, I do I do. I, I’d say that one of my superpowers is my self awareness. And I noticed that at age 20, that’s what got me into coaching. My gift to the world is I want to help other people develop that sense of self awareness. And I don’t see that at all just be like, Oh, I’m better than anyone else. Because I have this basic self awareness. I think that I think as a collective, we’re becoming more self aware. Yeah. And, you know, stick about the kids or you’re a parent, right? Yeah. Yeah. Like the kids, I think just the more we evolve as a species.
Unknown Speaker 38:21
I believe that I am part of a shift in consciousness, modeling how some of this stuff can be fun. But like, ultimately, leaving that legacy is a big part of your message. That’s just how it like I said before, and that’s how I contribute to the collective. Yeah, that’s beautiful. I love it. So where can people find you? How can people like, Are you selling anything right now that you feel like especially passionate about where can people find you? Yeah.
Unknown Speaker 38:52
I just say, Come follow me on Facebook.
Unknown Speaker 38:56
My handles facebook.com/diva. Dom daddy, which is a whole ass identity that I
Unknown Speaker 39:07
we didn’t bring that part in here.
Unknown Speaker 39:11
But other than I’m on Instagram, as well, but you can find my Instagram, do my Facebook, but okay. Yeah. And I’ll include obviously, all the links in the show notes. Yeah. Is there anything that your Is there anything? I’d say right now, nothing that I want to is fully baked that I would okay. But I invite you all to come and binge my content. Because this is something that I will hop by or that personal branding is my shit. Yes, cutting is my shit. If you want to see how to develop a very intimate relationship with your audience want to learn how to create content. I’m always dropping knowledge and gems that you know that teacher archetype is really like if anything, come learn. And all I ask you to do with that I’m not trying to sell you anything. Go out there and apply these teachings because it’ll make a massive impact on your business and your sales and your competence.
Unknown Speaker 40:00
Yes yes you are you are very like a maybe are so amazing at content creation like the whole process of it. That is like your genius for sure. Thank you
Unknown Speaker 40:14
This was so fun. Thank you, Max. Thank you for this beautiful little conversation. And yeah, I know that people are going to enjoy this as well. Thank you love it. I’m excited to come back and do it again sometime.
Unknown Speaker 40:35
Thank you for listening to today’s episode. Remember to hit the subscribe button to get notified of new episodes dropping on the new and full moons of each month. And if you haven’t already, leave us a five star review on iTunes to make sure that everyone who needs this transmission receives it. Until the next episode I’m sending you fierce fierce love.