3.15 | You Don't Need Money with Pattie Belle Hastings
Isha Vela: [00:00:00] Welcome to Devotional Anarchy, a podcast about intimate embodied leadership that is radically human, honest AF, and thereby inherently disruptive to systems of disempowerment and disconnection. I’m Isha Vela, trauma psychologist, certified somatic intimacy alchemist, wealth wizard, shadow doula. Love Anarchist, Intuitive Channel and Sovereign Business Coach.
You’re here because you know intimate self connection is the source of everything you want to create in life and that building safety and trust in your own body is what allows you to fully own and steward your energy and your relationships. Get ready to experience. For attachment, sexuality, spirituality, self-expression, and sovereignty, and other relational themes from a trauma responsive, somatic, energetic lens.
The conversations and tools shared in this podcast are designed to offer permission to create the abundant life, love, and business that lights your [00:01:00] soul on fire.
Hey, devotional Anarchists. I’m so excited to share with you this revolutionary conversation about money with Patty Bell Hastings. Paddy Bell or PB. Is a soulful entrepreneur. She’s a professor of design thinking and a certified hypnosis practitioner. So I met PB for the first time in person at a gathering for local healers, because I’m lucky enough to live in the same town as her, but it wasn’t until after the pandemic that we began to develop more connection and we found that the connection was through supporting people in their relationship with money.
And we found that we have similar thoughts and feelings about. abundance mindset, prosperity, things of that nature. So don’t get it twisted. PB is a serious witch and offers her [00:02:00] hypnotherapy services for people wanting to journey into their past lives, between lives, et cetera, and for divine finances. She has certification in nonviolent communication, neurolinguistic programming, facilitation.
By design, advanced coaching, financial therapy, shamanic journeying, like so many things, so many things. And so in this conversation, we address money and needs. And at one point, I let PB take me through the process of compassionate communication around some of my own money issues. And you’ll find the compassionate communication worksheets, which are so incredibly helpful in the show notes.
All right, so let’s get into it. Okay, Patti Bell, I am so excited to have you here on the podcast. So um, I am so honored to be here and thrilled to be talking about these things with you because I am absolutely [00:03:00] passionate about money, money issues, compassionate communication, and all of those things that weave together around it.
And the somatic pieces, this limit, we can’t leave out the somatic pieces. Exactly, exactly. And you know, you and I have had a lot of, a lot of conversations over the last couple months about like how deep some of this goes. Yeah. Yeah. So let’s, let’s get right. Let’s, let’s talk about how you work your magic with people.
Like, what is it that What’s the essence of your work? Okay, so, I am a hypnotist, and you know, people talk about limiting beliefs or whatever, but very often we have no idea what those actual limiting beliefs are. Yes. So, my process takes you under the hood. Like way under, like into the subconscious [00:04:00] or the super conscious or the higher self, et cetera, to find those things that happened this life, other lives, whenever that lodged in that we can then release.
And I’ll give you some concrete examples of that later. I’m not going to go into that right now, but I take a hypnotic approach to the money work. There’s also homework. There’s also very tangible things that we need to do. Um, I do not use the a word a, b, u, n, d, a, n, c. Okay. So I talk about prosperity and flourishing, right?
Yes. Um, and Uh, no, you know, it’s like very much about the mind and the body and not about magical thinking or, you know, that kind of thing. Although we can bring ritualizations and [00:05:00] practices into our money work, um, that’s not generally where we need to start off. So I found that for you, Heidi Bell, I I’m, I’m interested in that.
Like why don’t you use the a word and you’re, you’re, you know, part of the reason why I’m so attracted to your work. And excited to, like, have this conversation with you is because you’re, you’re very grounded. Like, you’re so no bullshit grounded and you are also very magical. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Right? So it’s like…
Very witchy, very magical. That’s all part of it, but it’s so grounded in, in the practices in, in this very, very deep work. And so like, yeah, let’s, let’s sort of debunk for a moment, a little bit of that, of like what we see in the industry in. Money healing that you’re not about yes. Okay. So, um, [00:06:00] there’s a lot of talk about the law of law of attraction and manifesting and that is so not what I’m about.
Law of attraction, abundance manifesting. There’s lots of people, you know, covering that territory. Yeah. To me, you know, there are many, many layers. Embodied layers, family layers. The family money history is like its own thing. I mean, what we pick up from prior generations from, you know, that’s, you know, that, um, epigenetic money trauma, you know, so there are a lot of things going on there and I’m very much about casting the light into the shadows of money work.
Right. So it’s not about positive thinking. We have a lot of difficult, [00:07:00] uncomfortable emotions that we need to process and move through. Yes. And release and chastising ourselves about positive thinking and not being an abundance magnet or manifestation, whatever, whatever it is, you know, to me, it’s, it’s so much more complicated than that.
You know, from all of the drama research, you know, the body keeps the score vessel, band, VanDerKolk’s, um, work. Uh, you know, we have a lot of stuff in here, , we need to get loose. Right. . Yeah. Yeah. And, and the shadow side, like I love that you said casting the light into the shadow. Like where you said at the beginning about like, Beliefs like we’re not you can’t do mindset work or belief work if you don’t even know what beliefs you’re holding in your system [00:08:00] Yeah, like that’s what my experience has been like, oh, I didn’t even know that I was believing that It’s just so in the back of our awareness, right?
Exactly. Exactly. And, um, that’s why I really liked the hypnotic work is that with the right guidance, you can go in and, you know, um, release some of recognize. Like a lot of times it’s things we didn’t even remember happening, right? Or it could be inner child work, or it could be parts work, or it could be, it could come up and, and appear in so many different ways, right?
Um, so casting the light into those, casting the light into where we hold shame around money, where we pick that up from our families. Etc. All of that is really, really important. Um, but, you know, the bomb [00:09:00] I dropped on you and I want to share with the viewers or listeners is that money is not a need. Yes.
Let me say that again. Money is not a need. A need. And you’re out there going, what are you talking about? I need money, I need it now. Well, actually, money is a strategy to meet the need. And that’s really what I want to dive into today. Because meeting our needs, oh my gosh, that. Is freedom. That is liberation.
Yeah. Right. So, so what I’m weaving together here originated with Marshall Rosenberg’s nonviolent communication and his four step process. And I’m going to weave that in with some of the [00:10:00] somatic stuff because that was the piece that Marshall really didn’t. You know, recognize or work in like we are bodies.
We are human bodies and we have these feelings in bodies. Yes. Right. Yes. So, um, so when I say that money is not a need. It is actually a strategy to meet a need. We’re going to kind of dig into that a little bit. Um, and we’re, we’ll do a little role play so that you can see how this process works in your daily money life, right?
Because money is a part of our lives and it is an excellent strategy for meeting many, many, many of our needs. It’s not the only strategy though. Um, so, and if we look at it, if we can separate it off from being a need to being a [00:11:00] strategy, then we can really sort of, we, then we can really process the feelings, the shame, the guilt, the whatever it is, the uncomfortable baggage that we’re money.
So we’re going to make this
Little workbook available to everyone that walks you through this process, but we’re going to do it together. So you kind of see how this works. And in this packet, the 1st thing we have, um, actually, I’m not sure what order this is, but let’s talk about the real needs. The universal human needs 1st, and there’s a rather lengthy list of universal human needs.
You won’t see money on here. You won’t see control on here. Um, there are a lot of things that you won’t see. You won’t see a house. You won’t see a car, [00:12:00] right? Um, you won’t even see necessarily, uh, transportation. That there’s actually needs underneath that. What you will see is shelter and safety. Yeah. And security, right?
Yes. Um, so when we look at the needs around that, then we can say, okay, what kind of strategies can I use? What strategies are available to me to meet these needs? And I really, I really like, um, the compassionate communication sort of like the basic underlying belief is that we’re just all trying to get our needs met.
Oh, yeah. We’re all humans trying to get our needs met. Some of those are very effective strategies that we use and some of those are very destructive strategies we use, but we’re still trying to get our needs, needs met. Yeah. The burglar trying to meet some kind of need. [00:13:00] Right. Um, so that’s not effective.
But, um, well, in some cases, I guess it could be. So let’s, um, let’s dig into like an example of this. Okay. Um, first we’re gonna look at feelings. Universal human needs. How many are there? Well, this is not like the definitive list. This is as definitive as I was humanly possible of getting it, right? Um, but I’m gonna guess that they’re like about, what, 250 on here ish?
All right. Okay, cool. And those are, um, adventures, celebration, creativity, diversity, equanimity, self connection, self expression, you know, those, those sorts of universal human needs. So then when we’re not getting those needs met, whatever those needs [00:14:00] are that we’re having in the moment, then We have a whole list of feelings when needs are not met, and these are the uncomfortable feelings, anxiety, dread, fear, foreboding, um, antsy, alert, alarmed, those sorts of things where our body, our, our humanness is telling us there’s a problem.
Yes. There’s a need that’s not being met. Right? So there’s no bad emotions. There are no bad emotions. It is wisdom from our being, our body. That is sending us signals that there’s something, there’s a need that wants to be met. That’s not being met. And that could be met by somebody else, or it could be met by ourselves.
You know, it could be met by culture or society or government or however, those needs need to get met. [00:15:00] And then there’s a sheet with feelings when needs are met. Um, so these are ones like rapturous, thrilled, engaged, self connected, satisfied, relieved. So we can really kind of feel and see and hear the differences there.
Yeah. Yes. And then I have a list that really nobody else has, um, that’s, that’s combining these things and that is a list of sensations. Oh, yes, yes.
Sensing what we’re feeling in the body gives us information that we can use in making our life better, right? Yes. And, um, you know, having a vocabulary for these sensations. Expansive, faint, fiery, flaccid, [00:16:00] paralyzed, parched, right? All of those are sensations that we experience in the human body. And they give us information.
They help indicate, you know, what our, what our needs are. Um, and I’m not gonna, I’m, I’m not going to pretend like I’ve always been aware of these things. I only started my true somatic journey when I was like, in my early to mid thirties. So, um, this has developed over time. I just didn’t, you know, automatically know these things.
I had to work through this stuff. I still have to work through this stuff. It’s not done. It’s never done. Um, so I’m of a certain age where. I grew up in a part of the U S the Southern part of the U S where women didn’t have needs and there were only three emotions, mad, sad, [00:17:00] glad. And only one of those was acceptable.
Right. Yes. Yes. So when I first started this work about 10 or 15 years ago, the, um, nonviolent communication, compassionate communication work, I was like. I don’t have any needs. I had to work my ass off to, to unpack, you know, where that was coming. And what were my needs? What were my needs? I had no vocabulary for needs.
Right? Yes. Um, so, you know, this has been, you know, this has been an unbelievable, enlightening journey for me that, that is, it’s just changed my life and my relationship to everyone in it. So with the sensations that informs how we interpret and understand our feelings. And if we think about all those body terms, [00:18:00] like I’ve got your back, right, that’s safety and security.
Right. Absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah. That support, safety, and security, um, that knocked me off my feet, ungrounded, right? I’m not, I’m not able to stand, you know, it’s like, so we have all of these, all of these parts of language that are worked in that, that, yeah. Tie the sensory into those basic human, human needs, those universal human needs.
Yeah. So that gives you the outline. Now the four step process, um, and I’m going to add the sensations in here. Right to one of the steps. The first step of the process of determining what our needs are, and then working through, you know, figuring out how to meet those needs. The first step is objective observation, [00:19:00] and that is like a movie camera is recording it without judgment.
Analyzing comparing or advising, right? So without judging ourselves, if we’re if this is a self reflection project process or without judging others, and I’ve got an example of that tied to money. Because we’re going to really focus on like the money piece of this money work of this. So the first one in an observation without judgment.
All right. So the observation with judgment, Oh my God, I do not have enough money in my bank account to pay my rent. That’s an observation. You know, um, that’s making a judgment. I don’t have enough, you know, um, and then it could turn into self blame, shame, fear, terror, [00:20:00] you know, all of those, all of those feelings of need not met, need not met, need not met.
Yes. Yes. So the observation without judgment or analyzing or comparing or any of those things would be my bank account has 1, 225 in it and my rent is 1, 500. Mm hmm. Right. That’s, that’s the observation. That’s the observation. Then we can look at the feelings and say, I feel fear. I feel anxious. I feel insecure.
I feel, um, you know, all of the, and you can locate it. It’s like, Oh, I have, I have this tightness in my gut. Oh, my chest. It’s hard to breathe. Oh, my neck hurts. Or I’m getting a headache or however it’s showing up in your body. [00:21:00] Right. So step two would be feelings and sensations, feelings and sensations. Yep.
So what’s the observation? Uh, I just looked at my bank account. That’s the observation. I’m having feelings, big, big feelings and sensations. And then, um, immediately, you know, self compassion is what is really, you know, I guess that would be, you know, a mini step. In between figuring out what your needs are then under that so that self compassion.
They’re there. They’re there. It’s going to be okay. Just, you know, ground yourself or let’s drink a glass of water or something. And even in that, even in that Patty bell, there is the meeting of needs, right? Of just the soothing, like just to [00:22:00] soothe your nervous system. Yeah. Get a glass of water. Do you need to just sound right?
Yes. Right. Yeah, this is not a process that needs to be rushed. Um, so, you know, once we look at, get those feelings out and in this case, you know, there’s a worksheet you can write them, write them down, anxious, fearful, uh, stomach churning, whatever it is, then we can start to look at that universal needs list.
And because we’re doing rent, I already know where this is, this one’s pretty clear for some others that might be a little more, it might be a need for beauty or need for this or need, you know, other more unusual or complex needs for this one. The need is pretty clear shelter. Yes, safety, security. Yeah.
Right? [00:23:00] So if we just start there with the, uh, I don’t have enough in my bank account to pay 1, 500 rent, and I’m feeling these things and my needs are safety, security, and, um, shelter. Yeah. Um, because we do as humans need shelter. So, um, once we go through that, the first three steps. And then we’re like, oh, all right, so this is really about my security shelter and safety.
Then we can start looking at requests or strategies or solutions. To the issue around money that we’re having right so, um, on the worksheets, you know, the way that I’ve written it out when I see that I do not have enough money in my bank account [00:24:00] to pay my rent. I feel anxious, insecure, and worried because I need and value safety, security, and shelter.
Right. Yeah. So, and, and the reason that these exercises are in here so that we can actually use these for anything. We can use them for relationship issues. We can use them for parenthood issues. This helps us start to recognize how we can communicate better, frame things better, meet our needs better, meet other people’s needs better.
Absolutely. This is gold. So then, um, you know, once we have hashed all that out, we’ve gotten ourselves into a place where we’re calm enough to like think through some strategies or requests or, um,[00:25:00]
then we’ve got the worksheet that starts with the need, right? Because I need or value safe, shelter, safety, and security, I can meet those by. And in this, and then in this situation, we can, um, you know, come up with all kinds of different ideas. Around making up that what 300, 300 to cover rent, right? So I can meet those needs and values by selling something by taking on a roommate by, um, during the pandemic, we saw this huge, huge, massive movement of people back in with their parents.
Yeah, or other family members. Yes, right. Yes. It was imperative. Yeah, right. [00:26:00] So, um, I can make a request of myself that I look more closely at my budget and how I’m using my money. Um, now the requests that we make of ourselves. There are a few things that we want to do it, do we want them to be specific realistic and time bound.
Yeah, so let’s say. I had enough money earlier in the month, but oops, I went out a lot and spent a lot on eating out, right? Um, if I just say, if I make a request of myself that I’m not going to eat out, that is not specific, realistic, or time bound. All right. Yeah, that makes total sense. Um, I am going to Get the groceries and make a [00:27:00] meal plan and, you know, prep out the next week of food.
So I’m not tempted to eat out that I have everything ready. I can have somebody over if I want to, to eat some of this with me. Right. So, so that’s a specific, uh, specific request of self. Yes. Right. Yeah. Love it. Um, so. That’s, that’s in a nutshell how this process works, right? So in, in this, we’re learning one, a vocabulary of our feelings.
We’re learning to sense them and experience them in our bodies. We’re learning how to articulate our needs that are underneath those feelings, having a vocabulary and an understanding around those. More clarity on how to get those needs met, whether it’s [00:28:00] making a request of, you know, our partner or, you know, our child or our colleague.
Right. Being able to frame a request of them to try and meet a need and also. Having more strategies to meet our own needs. Yeah. Right. When someone else is not capable of, of meeting a need. Exactly. Yeah. I love that. Yeah. Uh, so any questions about this or do you want to role play another one? Let’s, let’s role play one.
Okay. Let’s role play one. Where do you want to start? Um, think about, sorry, I got something in my eye. Um, think about. Um, a recent experience with money that you might, that you won’t be, that you don’t mind [00:29:00] sharing with the public. And it can be pleasurable or uncomfortable, either one. Um,
yeah, I’ll share. I’ll share that, you know, when I was in Costa Rica, I paid for everything in cash because, you know, there were international transaction fees that I wanted to avoid and in some cases I couldn’t avoid them. So sometimes I had to use my, my debit card. Um, so that, that made me feel uncomfortable.
Um, and then also like getting charged more at the car rental place, for example, because I have a debit card and not a credit card. So instead of getting, having a 500 deposit, I had a 1, 000 deposit. Um, so yeah. [00:30:00] Okay. Okay. Excellent. So let’s see if we have the observation, um, because you were using a debit card and not a credit card, you were being charged more up front, uh, for the services.
Yes. Yes. Which is totally whack and doesn’t make any sense, but. Right. Right. That’s the judgment. See? That’s the comparing and judgment. Right? And as you’re saying it, what I was, I’m remembering that I was feeling in the moment was this sense of like, there’s this shame that comes up for me that is like, I’m noticing and I’m feeling it.
And I’m, it’s so interesting because I know it’s not true even as I’m feeling it, but it’s like, It’s like being marginal. It’s like [00:31:00] being on the outside. I’m not part of society because I don’t have a credit card and I don’t get to like, you know, I don’t do the same things or wield money in the same way as other people do.
That’s a choice that I’ve made based on circumstances that I’ve had. And, and at the same time, there is a little bit of a, something a little sticky around that for me. Yeah, so shame, you’re feeling some shame. Where did it show up in your body? Do you remember? I feel like it’s a little bit upper body. It feels mostly like shoulders, chest, back.
Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Yeah, that’s what’s showing up now, too. I just feel it more here. Yeah. Yeah. So if we’re looking at the Needs the human needs, uh, I’m guessing I’m going to guess, and this is called empathy, guessing, [00:32:00] guessing someone’s feelings and needs. I’m going to guess that, um, your need for dignity was not being met.
Yeah. I’m guessing that that might be one of the needs. Yeah. Um, yeah. I had this happen recently at a, when I went to Montreal this year, I had it happen at a hotel where they were like, you don’t have a credit card. And I was like, no, I booked the reservation with this debit card that you have in your hand right now.
Right. So there was like, when you say the dignity is like, yeah, there is like this questioning of like, are, are you legit? You know, and I’m like, what is happening? Yes. Yeah. I can pay for this hotel. Like, it’s all good. Um, let’s see. Uh, I’m wondering, as I’m looking at the list of human, uh, universal human needs, I’m wondering if, yeah.[00:33:00]
Um, and you can say no to any of these, these, I’m, I’m just guessing I’m wondering if, um, some belonging. Yes. Yes. Belonging is there for sure. And that is that, that is a recurring theme that is sort of like an old wound for me. That’s why there is this shame that comes up. It’s very, very old. I know exactly where that shit comes from.
And, you know, when we look at these universal human needs. Everybody’s different and everybody has, like, they’re stronger in some areas than others. Some of the ones that I have real, you know, strength around other people don’t and vice versa. Yeah. Um, belonging is a pretty common window. Um, we’re, and especially since the pandemic, trying to get our need for belonging [00:34:00] met is a struggle.
Um, respect. Understanding. Maybe. Yeah, the dignity one just hits. Yeah, the dignity. That was the one that jumped out to me. All right. All right. So, so let’s, let’s move forward with primarily dignity for this. And we’re going to go to our phrases. Now we’re going to do the process when I, and you’re going to describe what you Gzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgzgz
Is this someone questioning the fact that I don’t have a credit card? I feel, um, is this like my projection or interpretation or is this, [00:35:00] you feel when I observe someone questioning why I don’t have a credit card, that’s the neutral observation. I feel shame and discomfort for not having what other, most other people have.
So, so you feel shame and discomfort. Because I need okay. Okay. Dignity and belonging because that because you’re getting into the comparing when I say because I don’t have what other people I’m not operating in the same, you know, like cultural expectations that other people it’s none of that. Okay, none of that need belonging and dignity.
Okay. Okay. I feel shame and discomfort because I need belonging and dignity. Yes. Yeah, because all of that other stuff, they’re thought forms. They’re thoughts that we’re attaching to these things that are feeding the [00:36:00] feelings, right? Got it, got it, got it. So, um, because I need dignity. And belonging. I can meet those needs and values by
connecting with people who love me and see me. Yeah. Yes. Um, perhaps, uh, crafting a statement that you use in those circumstances.
So, you know, having a sense of, I’m going to be, I’m going to be using my debit card in a situation that usually takes credit cards. I’m going to have my boilerplate statement that I make that speaks truth to power, makes me feel, you know, powerful and strong and [00:37:00] meets my need for dignity. Right. And it’s like, you know, when, when you, when you said that just now, I was like, when you were thinking about strategies to meet the need for belonging and dignity, one thing that I was thinking about was like remembering why I don’t have a credit card, remembering why that’s important to me.
Yes. That it’s part of like my values and, and like choice. Yes. Right? So yeah, that’s one way that, as well, right? But that boilerplate statement, I had never thought of that. That would be fantastic to just have something like, yes, and this is why. And taka taka taka, and here it is. You are a teacher, coach, um, you know, that’s your chance, right?
Yeah. To, you know, educate. Yeah. Educate. Yeah. Right? So, uh, what are a couple of other strategies? Or requests you can make of yourself? [00:38:00] Hmm, requests that I could, that I can make of myself. Um. Let’s see. Let’s say, um, let’s say that. One of these experiences happened, you haven’t like prepared yourself for it, you know, and you’re in that moment, like, what could you make a request of yourself to do when these surprise.
Yes. Uh, questionings come up. Well, one thing that I do already do, that could be part of it, is just kind of like anchoring myself. Like, taking a breath, and feeling my feet on the ground, bending my knees a little bit, and just kind of like, letting myself really kind of anchor into my own body before I make any sort of movement.
So before I speak, slowing myself down, coming back to myself, right. And not getting like up [00:39:00] in my head and all anxious and right. Feel the, whatever nervous system reaction I’m having based on the discomfort. Yes. Yes. Okay. Great. So that is specific, realistic, and time bound. So you’re going to pause, breathe, anchor, come into your body, let those uncomfortable sensations pass, and then, and then respond, and then respond.
Excellent. Excellent. Beautiful. All right. Yeah, that was so, that’s really cool. Um, I like this process because it, right, like, you know, in this process, you’re removing story. Right? Whenever we can remove story, right, we can, there is, there is more clarity. There is more like, there, yeah, there’s more opening for solutions.
Right, exactly. And with money for most of us, [00:40:00] whether we have a lot of it or we have none of it. or we have what we consider just the right amount of it, it’s still fraught. It’s so fraught, it’s so tied up with cultural implications. So depending on what country you’re in, you have different money, you know, cultural programming.
Um, so, you know, it’s work. That’s critical. It’s and I think that that’s why you and I have both been drawn to this and particularly as women Yeah, right. We’re not given a great education Money great money education here In the u. s. This is very u. s. Culture that I’m speaking from that I I have lived other places, but I don’t know enough to talk about those.
So, you know, it’s like As a woman, you know, going through [00:41:00] divorce or whatever it is, whatever other things that we experience. You know, there’s so much to process, there’s so much to heal, and it’s not overnight. It’s something that we have to be gentle and slow and compassionate with ourselves about. It’s really, really critical work.
And You know, I think that there’s so many different ways that we can approach it. And then it’s like, once we are casting the light into the shadow, then we can really dig into the prosperity and the flourishing and the magic. Yes. Yes. Absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah. And what are, what are some of the common shadows that you see in the clients that you work with?
What are some of the common themes that you pick up on? Um, because I am, I, I serve a lot [00:42:00] of artists, writers, healers, creative people, a lot of creative people, not entirely, but, um, a good percentage are creative. There are cult, there’s cultural programming around. You know what our value is. Yes, but the value of what we produces.
Yes, that’s really unhelpful. Yeah. And, you know, getting that cleared out of the way so that people can prosper is. Is, and everybody, I take everybody through differently because everybody has different flavors. Everybody has different family stuff around these things. Um, so, but that’s, that’s one of the big ones and especially around, um, a lot of women, like I would say 80% of my clients are women, so there’s a lot around gender and money [00:43:00] that has to be uncovered and healed.
Wow. Wow. And how do you see, what are, again, what are some of the themes there? Because like, you know, I, because, because I feel sort of like, identify as non binary, I don’t feel the gender piece as much for myself. Um, and maybe, yeah, I don’t know. I feel more like, I feel more sort of the class. Yeah, I, I think that Cultural stuff.
I think with Helping professions, caring professions that are largely populated by women. They’re not respected or, um, valued at the level of value that they’re contributing to, uh, society. [00:44:00] Absolutely. And, um, I think that, you know, we know that it shows up in the workplace. The statistics are there, you know, women are paid, paid less than men.
Yeah. And then when you add race. And yes, other things into that. Um, it’s, it’s even worse. Right. So, those, you know, finding out that the person next to you who’s doing the exact same job as you is making significant amounts of money more just because. You know, they’re male. It’s, you know, it’s, yeah, it’s painful.
It’s really painful. And there’s a lot of that that is subconsciously embedded in our programming right now. I think some of the generations coming up now or less, you [00:45:00] know, but You know, just the media, the, all of this stuff that we’re, we’re bombarded with, you know, can affect our understanding of value and that can be, you know, whether we are trans, whether we’re gay, whether we’re female.
Uh, whether we’re, whatever, however we identify and, and race, I mean, you know, they’re horrible, horrible cultural programmings, you know, that we swim in like water. So, so it really varies. I’ve had, you know, clients who have uncovered. In hypnosis have uncovered beliefs that, you know, lodged into them when they were six, you know, about the color of their skin and their value [00:46:00] that they didn’t consciously recognize in their day to day life, right?
Yeah. But going to that point and, and it was like, Oh, I, this belief, you know, settled in. Yeah. And I’m not even conscious of it. Yeah. And that’s incredibly freeing. Yeah. You can process that stuff and, you know, meet that little six year old and, you know, let them know that, you know, things are different and there’s love and healing to be had.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Did, did that answer your question? Yes. Yes. That did answer my question. No, this is good. This is good. And I love, you know, like we, I mean, for such a long time, I felt such a resistance to talking about money because this, this idea that money is [00:47:00] corrupt, right? That money ruins things, right?
That was such a powerful driver in my life that it just kept me.
I wanted to separate from it. And you’re bringing in the religious now, right? Right. Right. So money is the root of all evil. Yeah. And um, as healers or spiritual people or whatever, we’re not supposed to make money. Yeah. You know, so like, there’s, there’s all of these energetic threads. Yeah. And when you say it so directly, that’s not how it lives in our bodies.
No. It’s not how it lives in our bodies. And that’s why, you know, I, I wrote a post the other day about like mindset, you know, being so limited because it’s like the way that we hold these beliefs in our bodies is not money is the root of all evil. It comes through as disgust. It comes through. It’s like.
Feelings and sensations that are not words. [00:48:00] Yes. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I’m taking money from you. I feel shame. Yeah. Yeah. And then we dig down. It’s like, Oh, because. I believe that artists, you know, or, you know, underneath that is the cultural programming that artists shouldn’t be making money or healers shouldn’t be making, you know, it’s like, I’m charging what I’m worth and I’m getting it.
I’m getting paid, you know? So it was like, Oh, I feel uncomfortable. And yeah, so fascinating. I said, and this, the, the depth of it is the unraveling, it does take time and. Right? Like using techniques like hypnotic techniques and really getting to that source point is so important, right? And when you, when you’re doing mindset work and when you’re doing sort of like it, it doesn’t hit into those places.
It’s sort of like keeps you spinning your wheels because you’re not, [00:49:00] you’re not hitting the thing. You’re not hitting the source point of, of where the origin point. Of where these things live, right? So it’s like you’re trying to like, I don’t know, inject inject something into the body and it’s just like you’re not getting beyond the first layers of the skin, right?
Yeah, yeah, exactly. And just pausing like, you know, Hypnosis is like the fast track into the body and finding out, but let’s just say that we’re, you know, working through this ourselves and, oh, the, the stomach is tight. You know, we can pause and we can have a little conversation. Oh, what are you trying to tell me?
That’s exactly what message do you have? I’m going to get real, real quiet. Listen. Right. Right. And the body is very, like, it speaks very clearly. Oh, it speaks very clearly. Yes. Yes. Yes. It [00:50:00] will take you down. You don’t listen to it.
Oh, buddy. Well, this is so lovely. So lovely. And, um, yeah, like where can people find you? Where can people sort of like access your services? I know that you do like three session hypnosis sessions. Yeah, I I do a three package. Um, that’s how I start. I mean some people do more They have lots of different things that they want to to work on But basically I start with a three session package.
You can find me on my website at soul shepherd dot love and We can put the link in the notes and also we’re gonna make this handout Available to you so you can download it and use it to you know, when when this podcast is released so that you’ll have access to it. Um, but I have a wonderful free [00:51:00] hypnotic audio on prosperity and flourishing.
It’s only 16 minutes and the mind loves metaphors. It’s a metaphorical journey to uncover. and unblock some of those limiting beliefs that you might have lodged in. So if you go to my website and sign up for my email, then you can download this audio, um, hypnosis called flourishing. There’s a little worksheet that goes along with it.
You can use it as many times as you like. Um, but yeah, that’s available to you. And I’m really excited about. People getting these, uh, compassionate communication worksheets in their hands. Yes. And yeah, like you said, it can be used for money, it can be used for anything. So it’s like, whatever you want to direct that energy towards, you can use those worksheets.
Fantastic. That’s right. What a generous gift. Thank you so much, Patty Bell. You are [00:52:00] very welcome. You’re very welcome. This has been such an honor. And as you can tell, I could talk about this. I could go on and on. But I’m so excited to, you know, talk about money openly to share the struggles and the solutions that we can all pursue.
Thank you. Thank you so much. You are so welcome. Thank you for listening to today’s episode. Remember to hit the subscribe button to get notified of new episodes dropping on the new and full moons of each month. And if you haven’t already leave us a five star review on iTunes to make sure that everyone who needs this transmission receives it.
Until the next episode, I’m sending you fierce, fierce love